Sunday, October 15, 2017

Happy Now vs. Happy Later

In this post I am sharing, with her permission, a blog by Kristina Kuzmic, a popular Facebook video blogger who names herself the "Truth Bomb Mom."  She is able to tell it like it is, with a hefty dose of humor to help it go down.  A link to her video is at the end.  Enjoy!

Image result for Kristina Kuzmic and brownies



It has been a long day and it’s only 8:30 am, so I’m taking a time out because it’s finally time for breakfast. 

The offspring are not happy with their mommy, because their mommy didn’t give them every little thing they wanted, and now mommy is so tired that she’s talking in the third person, which is never a good sign.

Don’t get me wrong, I want my kids to be happy.  What I have to keep in mind, the little bit of mind that’s still functional, is what makes my kids happy now in this fleeting moment might not make them happy in the long term. 



A child reaches into a bowl of candy Oct. 31, 2013, in family housing on Buckley Air Force Base, Colo. Children went house to house collecting candy to celebrate Halloween. (U.S. Air Force photo by Staff Sgt. Christopher Gross/Released)


If I give my children every little thing they want, that will make them happy.  It might even boost their confidence for like a solid two hours.  But what will it teach them?  A lie.  A lie that life just showers you with whatever you want.  And when they realize, “Oh shoot, that’s not the way the world works,” then they’re going to be miserable; long term unhappy.  





They need to learn that you can’t and shouldn’t go through life only doing what makes you 100% happy every single minute.

Wiping my kid’s butt—that doesn’t make me happy, but you know what, I don’t want him walking around smelling like a turd.  



Scrubbing toilets—not my favorite thing.  Paying bills—hate it!  Pap smears, not enjoyable in the moment.  But in the long term, they’re probably a good idea.

I want to teach my kids to endure the boring and mundane and messy parts of life and then make the best of them.

And on that same note, let’s talk about disappointments.  The kid doesn’t get what he wants, and then he says “Oh, I’m disappointed.”  


Image result for child tantrum


And the parents are like, “Oh, no!  Sweetie, angel, precious little royalty.  Let’s fix your disappointment.”  Uh, uh.  Let’s not fix it, because you know what?  In real life you’re going to face disappointments the way every single human being does, and not all disappointments are fixable.

But another entitled brat who was raised by parents who just indulge, indulge, indulge instead of preparing and guiding and teaching, might just kill my faith in humanity.  

You know what will make my kids happy and confident long term?  Knowing there are consequences for their actions.  Knowing how to take care of their own basic needs because mommy and daddy won’t always be around.  Knowing that the world isn’t going to bend over backwards to make them happy.





You know where happiness and confidence comes from? Our attitude, our accomplishments, our actions, not our belongings, not from being spoiled.  Not from someone always catering to us or agreeing with us.

For example, eating this pan of brownies right now is making me really happy in this fleeting moment, but in the long term, I’m going to feel sick.  




Which basically means I’m a hypocrite.  But I want to do better for my children than for myself.  Yeah.  So should you.  So should you.

Truth bomb mom
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xB0KhiLWGYg
(copy and paste)





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